Diagnose yourself

[Khyron1144]

The best looking version so far was here.




This is available on thousands of sights.

[RowanMoonWynd]

When the waiter asks for your order, you go into the other room to tell him because "the napkins have ears."

You're always having to apologize to your next door neighbor for setting fire to his lawn decorations.

You have meaningful conversations with your toaster.

You begin to stop and consider all the blades of grass you've stepped on as a child, and worry that their descendants are going to one day seek revenge.

You wake up each morning and find yourself sitting on your head in the middle of your front lawn.

You like to sit in cornfields for prolonged periods of time and pretend you're a stalk.

I seem to be having alot of those problems lately.........

[sharess]

you like cat espeacilay with mayo

[Khyron1144]

Everyone you meet appears to have tentacles growing out of places that you wouldn't expect tentacles to be growing from.

That is such a problem for me.



Your father pretends you don't exist, just to play along with your little illusion.


How do you know I exist?


You tend to agree with everything your mother's dead uncle tells you.


I haven't met anyone smarter yet.

[corvus]

"Every time you see a street sign, you have the tremendous urge to relieve yourself on it."

What? this isnt normal?
Hmmmmmm

"You're always having to apologize to your next door neighbor for setting fire to his lawn decorations."

Well, yes, but have you SEEN his lawn decorations? Egad!

"You begin to stop and consider all the blades of grass you've stepped on as a child, and worry that their descendants are going to one day seek revenge."

Yeah, well that happened dammit! Once my lawnmower broke, it was revenge of the grass people!!

"You like cats. Especially with mayo."

Ummmmm NO! Ewwwwww yuck!
Now dogs on the other hand...

"Nearly everything you say involves the word "P-toing!""
No. "F'taghn".

"People offer you help, but you unfortunately interpret this as a violation of your rights as a boysenberry"
How many existentialists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A fish


Corvus Corax

[drkfirecloud61]

"You argue with yourself over which is better, to be eaten by a koala or loved by an infectious disease."

"You think that exploding wouldn't be that bad, once you got used to it."

"You try to make a list of the warning signs of insanity (cough)."

"People offer you help, but you unfortunately interpret this as a violation of your rights as a boysenberry."

[Khyron1144]

You write to your mother in Germany every week, even though she sends you mail from Iowa asking why you never write.


You wear boxers on your head because you hear it will ward off evil dandruff spirits.



You have meaningful conversations with your toaster.



Melba toast excites you.